HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
She is no longer a
BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN.
She is not a SCREAMER
or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.
She is not EASY - She
is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
She does not TEASE or
FLIRT - She engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION.
She is not DUMB - She
is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
She has not BEEN
AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
She does not GET YOU
EXCITED -She causes TEMPORARY BLOOD DISPLACEMENT.
She is not KINKY - She
is a CREATIVE CARETAKER.
She does not have a
KILLER BODY - She is TERMINALLY ATTRACTIVE.
She is not an AIRHEAD
- She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
She does not get DRUNK
or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
She is not HORNY - She
is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.
She does not have
BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.
She does not NAG YOU -
She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE
She is not a SLUT -
She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
She does not have
MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.
She is not a TWO BIT WHORE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER.
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT
MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
He does not have a
BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY
He is not a BAD DANCER
- He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN
He does not GET LOST
ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS
He is not BALDING - He
is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION
He is not a CRADLE
ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS
He does not get
FALLING-DOWN DRUNK -He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL
He does not act like a
TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION
He is not a SEX
MACHINE - He is ROMANTICALLY AUTOMATED
He is not a MALE
CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY
He is not afraid of
COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED
He does not UNDRESS
YOU WITH HIS EYES - He has an INTROSPECTIVE GRAPHIC MOMENT
Contributed by Clasik
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